What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

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Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

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Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

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A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

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Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

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Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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