Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your family have been involved in a fatal accident and we need you to come and identify the bodies.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

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The Female Orgasm

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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What is 5 brittish guys who can't sing and horrible music make .... one direction

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

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Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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