A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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A guy was beet by his wife.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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Why did the girl have twins she was raped

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

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How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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