A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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ur mum

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a man and a boy walk into a dark scary wood. "gosh I'm spooked" exclaimed the boy. "you think you've got it bad?" said the man "I'm walking out of here alone"

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So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a car? A. Four, I drive a Volkswagen Jetta

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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James Patrick Campbell

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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How do you cheer up a sad caterpillar? KILL IT WITH FIRE

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Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

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What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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Yanter, Look it up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops