How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

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whats red and and has 202 legs? an ostrich, ok i lied about 200 legs and the red part

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

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Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

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How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops