What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

I have a meeting with a man about a horse. I have a chance to win the triple crown. Barboro is gonna do awesome. Oh wait he is dead.

Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

have you ever had african food? neither have they

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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