Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

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Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

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have you seen Stevie Wonders house? Nope. oh well sorry for bothering you

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i don't get it...none of these are funny.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

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so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

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You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

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I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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i have an apple. now suck my dick

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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