Yo momma so fat, she died.

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What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

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what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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What happens when you cross an Asian with a bass guitar? An Asian man lies down diagonally across a bass guitar.

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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What's black, white, and red all over? The flag of the Arapaho Nation.

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why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

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What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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