A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

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what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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Somewhere over the rainbow.... Is land.

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did you know, that a Bear has 42 teeth? massive erection.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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What do you call a guy with four heart chambers, two pairs of extremities, and an aortic arch? Anatomically normal.

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

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civil rights

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down the hill. what black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

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pickle sniffer

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? There's an alive one at the bottom what's worse than that? He ate his way out what's worse than that? He enjoyed it

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A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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