- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

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what's one thing we're all tired of but they still make? Those crappy love songs.

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tea with milk?

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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I Have a Black Friend

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocost

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Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A baby right after I kill it

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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A priest walks into a bakers and asks for a loaf of bread , the baker asks "white or brown" the priest replies "it does not matter Sir I have my bike outside".

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Women's rights

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Yo mama so fat... Her doctor told her she's morbidly obese and she has 2 years to live if she doesn't change her eating habits and exercise regularily.

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Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

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Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops