Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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Why are Asians so smart? Because they study

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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A Frenchman stays and fights

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A man walks to a bar. The door was locked and had a closed sign so he walks away and goes home.

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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hey bill!

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Woman's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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And then i said what about breakfast at tiffanies, and then you said i hate that movie.

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*insert joke here*

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

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your brother so fine that hes skinney

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

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for keeps?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops