A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

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A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

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i love huge wieners.

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Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

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Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

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There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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