What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

How did the poor young women get Aids? She got raped.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

Your Mamma is so poor that she begs for money.

Justin Littleton getting laid.

hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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