A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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