Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

A jew, a homosexuel and a black guy are on a plane. It crashes and they all die in horrible circumstances.

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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