What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

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So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops