Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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CHEEZECAKE

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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Hi Danny it's Louis Tehe

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops