Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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VITAMIN C!

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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