There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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Men

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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"Knock knock." "No."

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

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knock knock ? Who's there ? idunnop idunnop who ? Eww you've done a what?!

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

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Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

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What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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( . Y . )

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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