Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

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penis likes vagina cuz its straight (get it?? it has an erection!!!!!!)

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

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Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

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Barbara Streisand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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