roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

What do you call a purple chicken eating a bicycle? A purple chicken eating a bicycle

Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

so today i took a poop. hehe

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

I've been hearing a lot of Jew jokes lately, Anne Frankly I'm sick off it.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

Take wrong turns

*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

Why do British Folk have yellow teeth? Genetics. Although scientists don't know the exact cause, it has been shown that people of British ancestory have a genetic predisposition which inhibits the body's breakdown and utilization of Vitamin C and Calcium. This causes decalcification and scorbutic gums. The British slang term "Limey" comes from the fact that the British Royal Navy was made to drink lime juice to prevent scury. The Royal Navy was almost wiped out by an epidemic of Scurvy.

a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 one years old to be in a bar.

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

Knock, knock! Who's there? orange? orange who? orange ya glad i didn't say your family was dead.

What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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