Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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Knock knock. Why are you saying that, you should actually knock the door. Oh ok.

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What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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What is the difference between me and you? I am not readin this joke.

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

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What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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