I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

How many ADD teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? Most likely only one. With advances in modern medicine, adolescents are experiencing large improvements in their abilities to focus on things from schoolwork to lightbulb changing!

Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

42, that is all

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

Like this joke, bitch.

why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

yes... that's the joke

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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