What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John. John Anderson. Dude we've been friends since first grade! You really don't remember me? I'm going home!

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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GONNA

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if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

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Q: A young friend you met on the internet invites you over to his house. When you arrive, Chris Hansen enters the room. What does he say? A: Welcome to our home

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if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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A Sloth runs...

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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