Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Jaden McMichael

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than people reposting the same joke all the time? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I've had Alzheimer's for as long as I can remember... So since yesterday.... CHAYOTE ASTRONAUT SPACE SAY WHAT?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops