Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? ...Nevermind, it wouldn't work.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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black guy graduating high school

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I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? No. Well neither did she.

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A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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Knock Knock trick or treats? here is the candies, have fun kids!

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Q: What's better than the Call Me Maybe video? A: A shot-for-shot parody of it featuring a GIMP! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFxnAITCv5o

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Wanna see some more?

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what is sticky and brown?a stick

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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why does column have a letter n?

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what did the horse say after the man told him to have a good day? nothing, horses dont talk.(:

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What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops