What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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oops

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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It's your mother, open the door.

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What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

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What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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Punchline.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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