Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Donald Trump

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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