your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

Nero, sure you are okay?

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

The 80's called. They need their couch back.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

How old is victor? Half past dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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