What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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