A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

knock knock Goodbye

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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