knock knock come in

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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What do you call an amazing person Good

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops