John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops