How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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Do you play piano? No

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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