Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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