1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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a man checks his mypsace

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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