a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

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Yo mama so fat.

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once upon a time, it snowed

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

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The child was fired from his job.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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Smeg...

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Stevan Hawkings walked into a bar. Ohh shit :/

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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Whats the difference between a black an white guy? They have different skin tones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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