Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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What's worse than being a midget Being a midget with no legs

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

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roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Your mom.

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What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

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Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops