whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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Where does the Queen of England live? England.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops