What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

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A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

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It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

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Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

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Its a long story, I got two balance nerves, I technically got four ear drums (relax you cant see it nor anything,neither can doctors without weird unpleasant stuff), I got about twice the number of synapses as regular people, and well, that makes me pretty damn good at some things, and a total retard at others.

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

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Penis

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what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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What's worse than getting raped by a black guy? Getting raped by a radioactive black guy

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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