What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"Almost as accidental as your spelling I'm afraid." -...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two black guys and two asians get pulled over. The cop says i cant let you go unless all of your dicks add up to 15 inches. They added up to exactly 15 inches - The black guys both added up to 7 inches each and the asians added up to 1/2 inch each. When they were driving away both of the asians said thank god we had boners.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats the best selling shampoo for children and family? gerrmany's shampoo german engineering. i'm not sure I get anti jokes wait you don't need engineering for soap? HITLER DID -audience- thats mean who else was mean? uhh Mao? Stalin? STDS? -audience- no HITERWAS MEAN wat happen to him he became the leader and fuher of germany and was onn world domination? no he died abullet and a pill died killed him oh god 11 million people died because of him and we make jokes about it -its ANITjokes okay? t make this S$75 any better doesn't revive the fallen -okay......... LOL I bet that soap was actually eaten before by actidneet -jesus shutup okay ok.. sorry man .. wait man? single person? but waht abut "audience" I guess I want a crowd as big as hitlers but all I get is my twisted autism - billy turner died from autism and arrested for practicing naziism in public.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

zx

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did the cerial killer get for christmas an electric chair

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

25

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The hooker walks into a bar wearing a vest and tight denim shorts. A drunken man proceeds in trying to have his way with her. He is thrown out for sexual mis-conduct and is currently waiting for his court date.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?... CAUSE HE FELT LIKE IT, IDIOT

thumb_up thumb_down -7

P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

WHATS A SHIT HOLE MOUNTNORRIS !!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops