Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To pick up the remains of the thousands of his friends that lost their lives to this joke.

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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What's 9+10? 19

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What did the astronaut say when he stepped on the moon? Oops, sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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