Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Miscarriages.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats black and strange a paki

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black airline pilot? An airline pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Link ate ink to make him sink.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops