A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

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What do you get when you cross a man with a horse? The Nobel Prize for your advancement of genetic sciences; centaurs aren’t real.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

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Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

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What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

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I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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Why didn't the Jew laugh at the joke concerning his familial genealogy in relation to WW2? He had orofacial paralysis and was therefore physically incapable of expressing joy through the means of his mouth

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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