What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

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A woman was strolling around town when she turned into a dark alley. She was cold and scared. Suddenly a ferocious looking man jumped out with a knife. The end.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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knock knock who's there Steve Go away

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Do you like fish-sticks? Love 'em. You like putting fish-sticks in your mouth? Yeah. What are you, a gay fish?

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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how did the man die he didnt

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Roses are blue vilotets are yellow, obviously I don't know this rhyme so well u have aids and will die of cancer at the age of 25, and so will ur mom

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What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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What's cooler than living on the sun? Everything, because the sun is the hottest entity in the entire universe. Plus, who'd want to live on the sun?

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

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Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops