The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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Why dont black people go on cruise ships Theyre not falling for that one again

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There was a black and white spotted dog named Louis. Why did they call her that? Because, that's what they named her.

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Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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Knock knock.. Who's there? Breaking. Breaking who? Im breaking up with you.

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Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

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What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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Seven people walk into the same bar, like a solid pole. Ouch!

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops