How many fingers do most people have? 10

An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

Q:Whats worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A: 8 dead babies in a barrel. Q: Whats worse than that? A: A dead baby in 8 barrels.

Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

One day a man walked into a wall

I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

why couldnt justin beiber get into the club? because hes not legal

What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...