Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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