how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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Your mom is so ugly, she buys groceries at the grocery store.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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385

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops