What do cows and grass have in common? They both say "moo", except for the grass.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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fduck

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

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whats long and stretchy? elastic

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Timothy started school at an elementary and was in the fourth grade. His teacher was Ms Bradshaw, and he liked his class. One day as he was going into class, Ms Bradshaw asked everybody, "what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?" Timothy raised his hand and said "the holocaust." The teacher went to her desk and pulled out a desert eagle and shot Timothy five times in the face and raped his dead body

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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