- Anti Joke

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

I added ICE to WKD it was WICKED

you know what is so funny?! jokes..................................

Yo mama is so ugly, she entered an ugly contest and placed well in her division.

Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

who did the strait guy marry? a woman

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Roses are red Violets are blue God makes things beautiful... What happened to you

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

Two children decide to bury a time capsule in their backyard and open it 5 years later. They then break into tears realizing they have no backyard because they are orphans. They are now orange.

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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