I have a crush on my dad.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

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A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

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Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

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guess what no i know what your thinking, its NOT chickenbutt. its that tomorrow i have a math test. that sucks.

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Why was the man crying? Because he was punched in the stomach.

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How do you make a blonde stupid as hell. Give birth to it

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

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Womens Rights.

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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