violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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Your mom is so hairy that she must not feel comfortable in her everyday life.

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I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

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My butt!!!!!!!!

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how do you confuse a blond?

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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If a prisoner got one visitor who would he ask to see An Eskimo

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John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

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Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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Person 1: Can I write a good anti-joke? Person 2: No. Person 1: Why nut? Person 2: All the gud onez r taken. ;-; tru...

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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